It takes a thousand voices to tell a single story

[1337]

Take part in the creation of this awesome story
about swordsman, samurai, merchants, evildoers (and maybe at some point beards). All you need to do is add 4 words to the story.

Simple rules: no double-posting, keep it clean and don't make it too unrealistic (edit1: nobody read that last word i guess lol). No edit and no dumb posts please.

The story takes obviously place in the Kenshi space / time continuum with the realism that it entails.

If this takes off, I'll update this post with the ongoing story. I'll start out (since that's easy)


Once upon a time

//and that's as far as i got until now =P help!!


edit1: Here's what we got so far (drink a beer beforehand):

Book One of the weak insect chronicles
" Jakumushi's big adventure (To file his income tax)"

Once upon a time in a dusty old house, there was a swordsman with a beard and a massive sword. A knock at the large steel door echoed. The swordsman named Jakumushi, alerted, looked up but decided to finished his morning dump.
"What fracking bad timing!" He said with anger.

Suddenly, from behind him a bandit came up carrying his abnormally large purple dildo of doom.
The bandit spoke up : "Master Jakumushi, I have come to help you fight the cat king. The cat loves the IRS and decapitations, therefore we must decide to kill him! Only one question remains... Bee army or not?"

"Summon the bee army!" said Jakumushi, without realising that the bandit had lost his magnificent sword 'Controller of b33s', which made him panic.

The bandit's unique sword was made to end the terrible 100 years long b33s rampage. It was caused by a very angry spoon who was dropped by a magic carpet salesman disguised as a beesalesman with a gambling problem. Quite regrettably. The air at that time seemed to have smelled of honey and grease chicken nuggets, and yet a hint of....lemon.

Back to the present, in which chaos reigns supreme, and even where our fighter waits for the tell-tale sound of firetrucks on the horizon beeping loudly at clowns carrying small leprechauns wearing funny shoes and shrieking madly.

"... And then the swordsman has come for me, so he turned towards the firetruck and ran towards the Leprechaun's maws and leprechaun said loudly : 'Where is this infernal ..."

Jakumushi turned his head towards his loyal bandit, not understanding why that idiot was telling him about his strange dream that made no sense...

"Lets go kill the cat king now!" he said "before he audits me and ransacks my large castle made of rocks and large green turtles supported on the backs of midgets in costume."

And so they went Into the darkness of the wild northern forest full of unicorns that smelled a bit funny.

Meanwhile, in another country two b33s farmers felt itchy. They decided to kill the b33s and become PlE merchants instead. Until one day the PlEs exploded in their newfound b33s enemies face and *CENSORED* *CENSORED* and *CENSORED* handily providing a moral.

"There goes my deposit" said one of the farmers.

Then suddenly a chinese trained masked wombat leaped and with one swift clap of his paws nearly killed the PlE merchants only to be shot by cyber Ronald McDonald.


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[Zombieslayer]

in a dusty old

[dragyouintohell]

house that had a

[MrX292]

swordsman with a beard

[Blxz]

and a massive sword

[1337]

, a knock at the



//please guys don't do a knock knock joke

[SilentHill]

large steel door echoed

[1337]

The swordsman named Jakumushi



//naming's not my forte =P

[txfirefighter]

Alerted, he looked and

[Blxz]

finished his morning dump.

[1337]

"What fracking bad timing!"

[Blxz]

Suddenly, from behind him

[dragyouintohell]

a bandit came up

[txfirefighter]

carrying his abnormally large

[Blxz]

purple dildo of doom



(I apologise, someone bought me saints row 3 on steam sale and that purple dildo weapon has been giving me nightmares)

[1337]

"Master Jakumushi, I have


//Im making that bandit a "friend", why else would he knock at the door?

[Blxz]

come to help you

[zergling18]

I took the liberty of copying and pasting the whole story in to one manageable thingy. I also cleaned up some of the grammar. We should copy and paste the whole thing for now on and add to the end.


Once upon a time in a dusty old house that had a swordsman with a beard and a massive sword. A knock at the large steel door echoed. The swordsman named Jakumushi, alerted, he looked and finished his morning dump.
"What fracking bad timing!" He said with anger . Suddenly, from behind him a bandit came up carrying his abnormally large purple dildo of doom.
The bandit spoke up "Master Jakumushi, I have come to help you fight the cat king."

[txfirefighter]

"But the cat loves

[toaster Assassin]

the IRS and decapitations"